Friday, September 21, 2012

Can’t-wash-your-hands Diet


I’ve been doing a lot of field work lately so the meals are a bit sporadic.

So lunch didn’t happen today and not because I didn’t have food, but because I couldn’t touch anything that would go into my body with my nasty, nasty hands. On a long day in the field, the only thing that can overwhelm your appetite is the thought of exactly how dirty your hands are. How many hands have you shaken? Door knobs have you touched? Snotty children have you picked up?

At home I wash my hands approximately 20 times a day—and not because I have OCD tendencies but rather because I drink an excessive amount of water and am constantly peeing, and then clearly I wash my hands (because I’m not nasty).

Here I quaff much less due to non-potable tap water; also the bathroom experience is much less pleasant. And lastly, who has time for body functions on business trips? Not I, my friends.

A note on hand sanitizer
You want to be able to wash your hands in a subtle way so as not to imply “I think you’re dirty” instead of the true “I’m an epidemiologist and just know too much about disease transmission”. However, hand sanitizer is really smelly so everyone knows you’re using it. Then you have to offer it to everyone and it becomes a novelty to explain. And this whole “my body just isn’t used to the same germs” talk is usually met with suspicion. At best it comes off bizarre, at worst rude. Not worth it, especially since TSA is going to take it away when you mistakenly leave it in your purse.

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